Suicide Loss Survivor


Heather Suzanne Crespo
7/16/1993 - 10/26/2015

I lost my daughter to suicide and I have to say, I will never be the person I was before. I have spoken to many Moms that have lost their children. Some lost their children in a car accident, some overdosed, some were lost to a physical illness and some were to suicide and mental illness. While any of these situations is painful, I can't say if suicide is more painful than any other way. Our children are all so very precious, and no matter the cause, it hurts. It's a pain that never leaves you. No matter the cause, if this happened to you, I am so sorry. There are no words to tell you that will ease the pain. Just know, you have joined a club that no one wants to be in. The club of Moms that have lost their children. In that club, there are some separate clubs. The club that I joined, that I never wanted to join, is the Suicide Loss Survivor club. No matter what sub-club you belong to, there are others in that situation that can listen to you, talk to you, and feel some of what you are feeling. These days, you probably won't have to look far to find a friend or a friend of a friend that knows what you feel.

I can't tell you what it will feel like for you, I can only share my personal experiences. I am a single Mom of 3 beautiful daughters. Yes, even though Heather is gone, she is and always will be my daughter. I can't tell you what it feels from a father's point of view because he was not in their lives. I can't tell you what it feels like to lose a sister either. My other daughters know, and while I can feel pain for them that she is gone, I can't tell you from their perspective. We are all unique individuals and each circumstance is different for everyone.

Through the posts on this site, I hope to share my story, Heather's story, and some of the things that I do to get through some of the bad days. Yes, there will be bad days. I don't see that ever changing. For example, Heather loved the Disney Frozen movie. She had the soundtrack and she would sing the songs all the time. I also love the movie and while part of me loves it because I can see and hear her in my head singing along, it is also painful because it is also a reminder that she is no longer with us. I want Heather to sing along with us, and that can't happen anymore.

To visit all my posts on being a Suicide Loss Survivor, click here.

This website will always be free for you to visit. If something I shared helped you, I will gladly accept any gift via PayPal by clicking here. I am not a non-profit organization. While the money would help with the costs of maintaining this site, gifts are totally optional. If you shop on Amazon by clicking here, I may also earn a small commission. (This will not cost you anything extra.) I do want to take this time to thank you for visiting my site.

Text HELLO to 741741 for free, 24/7 crisis support via text
National Suicide Prevention Hotline - 1-800-273-8255

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